my sweet sugar bear

After bathtime...

Before I was a mom....

Before I was a Mom
I made and ate hot meals.
I had unstained clothing.
I had quiet conversations on the phone.

Before I was a Mom,
I slept as late as I wanted
And never worried about how late I got into bed.
I brushed my hair and my teeth everyday.

Before I was Mom
I cleaned my house each day.
I never tripped over toys or forgot words of lullabies.

Before I was a Mom
I didn't worry whether or not my plants were poisonous.
I never thought about immunizations.

Before I was a Mom
I had never been puked on
Pooped on
Spit on
Chewed on
Peed on
Or pinched by tiny fingers

Before I was a Mom
I had complete control of:
My thoughts
My body
And my mind.
I slept all night.

Before I was a Mom
I never held down a screaming child
So that doctors could do tests
Or give shots.
I never looked into teary eyes and cried.
I never got gloriously happy over a simple grin.
I never sat up late hours at night watching a baby sleep.

Before I was a Mom
I never held a sleeping baby just because I didn't want to put it down.
I never felt my heart break into a million pieces
When I couldn't stop the hurt.
I never knew that something so small
Could affect my life so much.
I never knew that I could love someone so much.
I never knew I would love being a Mom.

Before I was a Mom
I didn't know the feeling of having my heart outside my body.
I didn't know how special it could feel to feed a hungry baby.
I didn't know that bond between a Mother and her child.
I didn't know that something so small
Could make me feel so important.

Before I was a Mom
I had never gotten up in the middle of the night every 10 minutes to make sure all was okay
I had never known the warmth
The joy
The love
The heartache
The wonder
Or the satisfaction of being a Mom.

I didn't know I was capable of feeling so much before I was a Mom.

Preview of Boston's photos

By Heather Owens Photography...I can't wait to see the others!
We elected to do her baby's 1st year plan where we get his photos taken at newborn, 3 months, 6 months, 9 months, and 1 year. We are definitely keeping her in business! However, my goal is to take a couple of photography classes and learn my new camera to help save money in the future!

To Boston: From Mommy

My little man;
You are now 10 days old and I am continually amazed everyday at you! I just wanted to blog about how I am feeling right now in hopes that someday you will read this and know just how much I love you! (I am sorry, but I am hormonal)
I never thought I could love something so much! I cannot imagine life without you now. I am so overcome with emotions everyday. All of the dirty diapers and sleepless nights are so worth it! I just cry when I look at you sleeping sometimes. I want you to know that you are so loved by mommy and daddy and we are so excited and proud to have you in our lives. I still cannot believe how blessed we are that God gave you to us. I thank Him everyday for you. I want to be able to protect you and keep you safe from this crazy world that we live in. My goal is to be the best Christian mother possible to you. You make me want to be a better person and example for you to follow. It is hard to believe that something as special as you came out of me! I am so thankful for your daddy, he loves you very much. I have never known a father/child relationship and I am so glad that you have him in your life. I look forward to watching your relationship grow.
It saddens me to think that I have to go back to work and leave you in someone else's care in just a few short weeks. I dread that day everyday. I don't want to miss any part of you growing up. Just know that just because I do have to work doesn't mean that I don't want to be with you every minute of every day. I can guarantee that I will be thinking of you that much!
Just know that I love you more than you will ever know and I promise to be the best mommy I can be to you my little man.

Love
Mommy

This song makes me think of you....
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QWaqB3Hy908

A growing boy...1 week check-up

We went to our first well baby checkup today. Boston is already growing so much! He gained 11 oz. in the last week!!! So now he is 7.1lbs and he also gained 1/2 an inch and is at 20.5in! We lucked out with the pediatrician, we both really like her. It is Dr. Laura Sanders at Arkansas Pediatrics. There were at least 2-4 others we wanted, but were not in our insurance network. My friend Tenille recommended her pediatrician, but he wasn't available and we got Dr. Sanders. She did say that I may be feeding him too much and to try a pacifier before I feed him to make sure he is hungry and not just wanting to "suck" for comfort. So I am going to give it a try. I just hope he doesn't become too dependent on the paci. Everything else looked great, no signs of jaundice and his circumcision is healing really well. She did give me a few pointers on breastfeeding and introducing formula supplements at about 6 weeks. We do not have to go back to the Dr until he is 2 months old. She did say not to get him out in the next couple of weeks b/c of the way the weather has been. If he gets the slightest fever, he will have to go back into the hospital. So it looks like I'm home bound for a little while longer, but it was so good to get out today! I have been stuck in the house for almost a week!

Heather came out to the house today to do his pictures and he did so good! He slept most of the time even though he was naked (which he hates being naked!) I can't wait to see how they turn out so we can do the birth announcements.

Let me just say motherhood has been the best experience ever! So far he has been such a good baby. He literally sleeps ALL the time! He hardly ever cries...I know it is still early and those of you who know me know that I am a pessimist and always expect the worst, but I hope and pray that he continues to be so laid back. We are so blessed!

Sacked out!

Murphy is very protective!

Thanks Aunt Nat and Aunt Amanda for the stork!

They are very curious!

Meeting his brothers

Going home!

Boston's Birth

This is how it all went down...

At my Dr. appt on Monday she checked me and I was at 2cm and 80%. I went back to work that day and was in pain the rest of the afternoon. Not contractions, but a constant pain in my lower abs and back. I started having mild contractions on my way home that day around 6:00 but nothing that could be timed, until about 8:00. At that point they weren't that painful but were about 10-14 minutes apart. I called L&D and they said i didn't need to come in yet unless my pain was unbearable, but try to wait until the contractions were 4-5 minutes apart. I finally went to be around midnight and woke up at 3:00 to pretty bad contractions. I started timing and they eventually got to about 8 minutes apart and were getting really painful. So I took a shower and we headed to Baptist.
We got there about 6:00, they checked me and I was still at 2cm. They called my Dr. and went ahead and started the IV and gave me stadol for pain. By the time my Dr. got there to check me around 10:15 I had dialated to 5cm and she broke my water (ouch!) By this time I still didn't have my epidural b/c they were waiting on my blood work to get back. Soon after, she left I got the epidural (yay!) much better! At 12:15 I was dilated to 8cm! Kyle's mom had left to get take his grandparents home and about 1:30 the Dr checked me again and I was at 10cm! Kyle's mom still wasn't back and she was supposed to be in the delivery room with us, so she said we had up to an hour max. They turned my pitocin down and I had to "labor down" for about an hour to wait for his mom. Once she got back, I started pushing. My contractions had slowed quite a bit so I had to push longer. I pushed for about an hour and then there he was!!! It was the most amazing and overwhelming experience ever!
We are now at home loving him every minute. So far he is such a good baby! Only cries when he has gas really bad. He is breastfeeding well and sleeping most of the time. We go to the pediatrician on Thursday for his first check-up! It's hard to believe it has almost been a week!

Boston Gavin has arrived! 2-10-2009!!!!

Boston Gavin Burton arrived on Tuesday February 10, 2009 at 3:41p.m. He was 6lbs. 13oz and 20in long! The birth went very quickly and we are all doing great! I will post more details later, but here are a few photos. Thanks to all of you for your thoughts and prayers throughout this exciting time! We are amazed at what we have brought into this world! He is perfect!

Hallelujah for Progress!

I am dilated to 2cm and 80% effaced! Woohoo! I know it is not much, but just knowing SOME progress has been made has helped my outlook tremendously! I was getting so restless this weekend feeling like I would be pregnant forever! Dr. W says the odds are good that it could happen anyday this week, but I go back to on Monday if nothing happens before then. She still won't budge on the due date so she will induce next Thursday the 19th and not anytime before.
I have been hurting ever since she checked me this morning, I guess those painless contractions are helping after all!
Another thing, tonight is a full moon. Statistically more women go into labor when a full moon occurs. It has something to do with the gravitational pull, weird I know...But the nurses have even commented about it being a busier time in L&D when a full moon occurs. Maybe just maybe the man in the moon will give Boston a little nudge.....

Dear Non-Pregnant Person...

I hope this doesn't offend anyone, but i had to post b/c i think it is so true! This is not directed to anyone in particular!

Dear Non-Pregnant Person,

I hope you find these guidelines helpful in your interactions with pregnant women as failing to follow them may result in serious physical harm.If you are thinking, surely she doesn't mean me- then you should probably read this twice.

1) The appropriate response to a couple telling you they are having a baby is 'Congratulations!' with enthusiasm. Any other response makes you an asshole.

2) Through the wonders of science, we now know that babies are made ONLY by the mother and father- not grandparents. Unless the baby is in your uterus or you are the man that helped put it there, you may not ever use the phrase 'my baby'.

3) On the same note, unless you made the baby as defined in 2, the pregnancy, birth and raising of the child are not about you. You do not have input. No one wants to hear your opinion unless they ask for it...

4) The body of a pregnant woman should be treated the same as any other body. You would not randomly touch someone's stomach if they were not pregnant, nor would you inquire into the condition of their uterus, cervix or how they plan to use their breasts. Pregnancy does not remove all traces of privacy from a woman.

5) Likewise, no woman wants to hear comments on her weight...ever. A pregnant woman does not find it flattering that you think she is about is pop, must be having twins, looks swollen or has gained weight in her face. Telling her she looks too small only makes her worry that she is somehow starving her baby. Making such comments invite her to critique your physical appearance and you may not act offended. The only acceptable comment on appearance is 'You look fabulous!'.

6) By the time we are 20-30 years old, most of us have picked up on the fact that the summer is hot. We are hot every summer when we are not pregnant. We don't need you to point out that we will be miserably hot before the baby comes.

7) There is a reason that tickets to Labor & Delivery are not yet sold on Ticketmaster. Childbirth is actually not a public event. It may sound crazy, but some women really do not relish the idea of their mother, MIL or a host of other family members seeing their bare butt and genitals. Also, some people simply feel like the birth of their child is a private and emotional moment to be shared only by the parents. You weren't invited to be there when the baby was created, you probably won't be invited to be there when it comes out either.

8) Like everything else in life, unless you receive an invitation, you are NOT invited. This includes doctor appointments, ultrasounds, labor, delivery, the hospital and the parents' home. You do not decide if you will be there for the birth or if you will move in with the new parents to 'help out'. If your assistance is desired, rest assured that you will be asked for it.

9) If you are asked to help after the birth, this means you should clean up the house, help with cooking meals, and generally stay out of the way. Holding the baby more than the parents, interfering with breastfeeding and sleeping schedules and making a woman who is still leaking fluid from multiple locations lift a finger in housework is not helping.

10) The only people entitled to time with the baby are the parents. Whether they choose to have you at the hospital for the birth or ask for you to wait three weeks to visit, appreciate that you are being given the privilege of seeing their child. Complaining or showing disappointment only encourages the parents to include you less.

38 week update

Well, I'm still pregnant. I have been getting a lot of questions about an update so here goes. I haven't posted much b/c I wanted to spare you of what seems like my constant complaining these days.
Not much change from the Dr appt last week. My cervix is thinning but still not dilated. His head is still very low. The Dr said she would be very surprised if he is a big baby, she is thinking 7.5lbs. But even though he has dropped, I can still feel his butt under my ribs! I am still thinking a 9 pounder.
I haven't been feeling good the last couple of days and have been getting more contractions, but they aren't painful, just uncomfortable. I really wish I didn't have to work until he gets here. It is exhausting and I have been working 9.5 hour days to make up time from weather, dr appts
etc. Getting sleep is nearly impossible because I can't get comfortable and have to pee every hour. The dogs have decided it is fun to get up in the middle of the night, multiple times so I have to get up and let them out or put Maverick back in bed. I pray that Kyle becomes a light sleeper when Boston gets here, b/c a bomb could go off and he wouldn't even know it! There is no way I will be able to get any sleep if I am getting up with a newborn and two dogs!
My next appt is on Monday the 9th which happens to be a full moon. Apparently there are stats that more women tend to go into labor on a full moon, I really don't know why but here's to wishful thinking!

I've Been Tagged

i've been tagged
Stephanie tagged me to fill out this fun survey about...me!

Step 1: respond and rework—answer the questions on your own blog, replace one question that you dislike with a question of your own invention, add one more question of your own.

Step 2: tag—eight other un-tagged people.

1. What are you wearing right now?
An ugly maternity shirt and work pants. I'm over trying to be cute...

2. What's the last thing I read/ are currently reading?
Breastfeeding Made Simple

3. Do you nap a lot?
no, who has time to nap?

4. Who was the last person you hugged?
Kyle

5. What's your current obsession/addiction?
Preparing for Boston to get here, blogging

6. What was the last thing you said out loud?
"I will try and work on it today"

7. What websites do you always visit when you go online?
Hotmail, Babycenter, Blogspot, Myspace, Regions Bank

8. What was the last item you bought?
Grapefruit Aromatique Candle for the house...smells yummy!

9. What is your most challenging goal?
Right now, probably adjusting to life as a new, working mom and losing the pregnancy weight.

10. If you could have a house totally paid for, fully furnished- anywhere in the world, where would it be?
Florida, on the beach

11. Favorite Vacation spot?
The beach

12. Say something to the person who tagged you:
Stephanie-I don't know you very well, but seem like I have known you forever b/c of blogging. I love all of the encouragement and advice, keep it coming!

13. Name one thing you just can't resist no matter how bad it is for you:
Bread

14. What is your favorite item of clothing?
Don't have one right now, but looking forward to wearing cute jeans again!

15. Favorite pair of shoes you keep going back to over and over, even though your closet is over flowing with a zillion others?
Black flats

16. Name one thing you can not live with out:
Internet

17. What is your biggest pet peeve?
Gosh, where do I start? Right now it is people asking "when is your due date/when is your last day at work/are you ready/what are you having, etc.?"; and cleaning our wood floors, only to have them completely dirty again by the end of the day!

18. what are your favorite shows?
Nip/Tuck, How I met your mother, Brothers and Sisters, Desperate Housewives, Grey's Anatomy

19. what did you do today??
Work, work, work & going to lunch with my friends Amanda and Jennifer!

I chose to tag the following 8 people...
Amanda P
Melissa R
Tara H
Tenille R
Kristen G
Amy L
Carissa H
Amy K